All-New, All-Different Reaction to Marvel's New Line-Up

I'm reading all kinds of inside-the-industry responses to Marvel's 45 title post-Secret Wars line-up this week.  All most all of it glowingly positive.  Everyone seems to be excited about this creative team's take on this, or the mixed-up roster for that X-men team, or esoteric character Y getting his/her own comic.  And while I admit the information dump is a lot to take in, this old school comics fan isn't quite so ready to ask Axel Alonso to marry him.  (I have a few emails from Axel from back in my letter writing days when he was getting started at Marvel, so I feel like I have an "in" if nuptials are in order).

My initial reaction was almost entirely negative, jaded skepticism.  One discussion with my local comic shop owner and that skepticism has been tempered with some guarded optimism and a slightly more open mind.  Listen, I'm going to be honest with you, long-time readers know that I have lost a LOT of faith in the past 10 years.  They absolutely destroyed my favorite character (Spider-Man) beyond recognition, and they seem to have no idea how to handle the rich history or their universe.  It is VERY hard for me to have a completely open mind for anything Marvel does.  When you have been burned as badly as I have, you're just not going to get unbridled enthusiasm.  I think anyone who honestly sits there and tells you that you are looking at 45 issues of pure gold is lying to you.  There are dogs in this lot.  I promise.

So, in the interest of doing more than just writing a bitter, scathing critique of Marvel's new line-up, I decided to wait a few days and chew on the big picture, then give you a quick-hit review of my first impression of each of the 45 titles.  I know it sounds like a lot, but all we really have to go on are some covers, some blurbs, and a couple of interviews, so some of these are going to be pithy at best. At the very least, maybe I will be able to provide some much needed counterpoints to all of the industry cheerleading that is going on out there.  You'll also notice that I am far less up the butts of the creators involved than most of the people out there.

Carnage:  Why does Carnage get his own comic book?  I know he's been a bit of a fetish for Marvel lately, but I just don't see this character carrying an entire comic, even with the legendary Gerry Conway at the helm.

Venom: Spaceknight:  I am so over Venom there really isn't much more to say.  Honestly, the character lost something the minute he became the Lethal Protector.  Larsen ruined him with the tongue and once he left Eddie Brock, there was no reason for him not to just become Carnage.  Now, he's off in space doing god knows what?  Is he still Flash Thompson?  I'll pass.

Ultimates:  Galactus and Black Panther are together on a super-hero team and you expect me to pay money for that?  No.

Web Warriors:  I'm going to call it now, this book does not see an issue #5.  Peter Porker?  In a universe with "real" human people, we have a Fred Hembeck cartoon.  Never mind the rest of the "Spider-verse" nonsense that is here, Spider-Ham is the final straw.  I don't even think the fan-ravenous Spider-Gwen can save this mess.

Spider-Man 2099:  I would be all over this one, actually, but the "Smack to the Future" blurb is so blowful that any excitement I had gets undermined.  I am hoping Peter David will prove me wrong.

Spider-Woman:  If you are 8 months pregnant and you even think about doing anything super-heroic, then you are a bad person.  Shock value will get everyone in the door, but I'm not convinced that there is more here.

Daredevil:  DD is one of those characters where I honestly feel that every story has already been told for Matt Murdock. Unless you just drop him back to street level and let his heroics be the outlet for his need for justice that is not met by his lawyering by day, you really can't do more to DD than has already been done. There is some intrigue that results from the Gambit-esque protege, but that's about all.

Howling Commandos of S.H.I.E.L.D.:  This one is so bizarre it will either work like nobody's business or it will be done before Christmas.  I like the line-up of monsters, but I'm not convinced the premise works.

Amazing Spider-Man:  Like with Daredevil, all of the good Peter Parker stories have been told.  All of the best ones were told before issue #401.  Marvel has finally admitted this and they've just gone ahead and made him Iron Man, down to having Spider-Man be PP's body guard.  Yes, it's that bad.  I'm already working out the retcon for this one.  Dan Slott has had a long run on Spider-man comics, but he's done very little that demonstrates he understands the character at all.  I can't believe I'm going to say this, but they should have left Doc Ock's mind in there.

Spider-Man:  Our only hope for a good Spider-Man comic lies with Miles Morales.  He's still a kid, I think, and he's still street level, I pray.  This is the only chance we have.

Ant Man:  I'm ready to skip over this one, but the supporting cast of C-List villains is giving me pause.  If it's handled correctly, this might be the dark horse of the lot.

Silk:  I know nothing of Silk.  I gather she is a shining beacon of goodness that emerged from the smoking pile of crap that was "Spiderverse," but I honestly know nothing.  It's the taint of Spiderverse that keeps me from seeing what this is all about.  I'm sure I'm missing something, but again, the taint.

Uncanny Avengers:  Let's reach into our character grab bag and the first 6 characters we pull out, we'll team with Deadpool and Spider-Man because those two sell a LOT of comics.  No.

Uncanny X-men:  Pick 4 mutants that no one cares about (sorry Psylocke) and let's team them with Magneto.  No.

All-New Wolverine:  Never mind the fact that, if this comic book makes it, a name change will be in order in a couple of years, I've never cared for X-23 in any way, but I am heartened to see a status shift handing the Wolverine mantle off to a different character, even if it is a full grown daughter from another universe, time line, dimension, something.

All-New X-men:  Again with the name thing, but honestly if an X-men comic has a chance, it's this one.  The 60's X-men were an interesting gamble when they were brought into the current Marvel U, and they were a fresh commentary on how dumb the X-men had become.  Can they avoid the same fate as those they came to mock?

Extraordinary X-men:  Look pretty ordinary to me.  And Ramos cartooning up the art chores will not help.

Old Man Logan:  This one is likely worth reading.  Everyone is nuts over this grizzled older version of the furry runt, so there is probably something here worth seeing.  At the very least it's a fresh take on a character that has been done to death.  (why no Old Man Peter Parker?)

Nova:  He's never been able to carry a book before.  Why now?

Karnak:  Another book that is so unlikely that it will work or flop right out of the gate.  Warren Ellis is capable of doing some great stuff here, but I'm not sure Karnak is the right platform.  It will take Paul Jenkins level work to breath life into this character.

Hawkeye:  This is another case of "50 million Elvis fans can't be wrong."  I'm willing to give this one a pass just on the fan excitement.  Will I read it?  Probably not.

Sam Wilson: Captain America:  I don't know why we need the "Sam Wilson" part of this, but I'm pretty excited to see a real successor to Steve Rogers that makes sense.  I only hope they commit to it and really give Sam a chance to be the great Cap I know he can be.

New Avengers:  You know who's counter-culture popular right now?  Squirrel Girl. Can she carry a team comic?  Maybe, but just in case, let's toss in Hawkeye and the Young Avengers.  No.

Illuminati:  Bendis so loved the Hood that he made him way cooler than he ever should have been.  But he had his day in the 00's.   This one doesn't get into the double digits.

Scarlet Witch:  And the Vision also gets his own comic.  Neither one should be able to carry a solo book.  Untapped potential?  Maybe.  Riding the coattails of House of M and hoping for a popularity resurgence?  Likely.

Star-Lord:  Guess who's red hot popular right now:  Guardians of the Galaxy.  Guess who the leader is?  Star-Lord.  Let's stretch the readership extra thin by giving him his own comic.  If they make him Space Han Solo, they have a chance.

Guardians of the Galaxy:  The curse of Venom ruins this for me.  I liked the "original" new team back in '08, but this has morphed into something I cannot recognize.  And the original original Guardians fan in me is screaming for justice.  No.

Spider-Gwen:  I know the fans are all hot and bothered about this, but for me, Gwen Stacy fell off a bridge and died in EVERY MARVEL UNIVERSE ever.  Having her become Spider-Man (woman?) is the dumbest thing I can think of, apart from her having kids with Norman Osborn.  She wasn't anywhere near the accident that created Spider-man, alternate universe or no.  And calling her Spider-Gwen is incredibly stupid too.  Fans are hungry for more Gwen Stacy, I get it.  That's what caused the whole clone saga which, in light of the past 20 years, now looks like a Marvel Masterwork.  It may be well written, it may be popular, but to me any thing that resurrects Gwen Stacy diminishes both her and Peter Parker.  I just can't go with you on this one.

Ms. Marvel:  I know next to nothing about this one, but I give Marvel props for trying to shake up the status quo.  Not enough there for me to be interested though.  It's possible this one just isn't for me.

Drax:  Maybe this is the new Silver Surfer comic for those looking to get their cosmic fix?  None for me thanks.

Angela:  Asgard Assassin:  The best thing Marvel has done in the past decade is acquire a new character they hadn't already written every possible story for.  Now they've mixed her in with Marvel's resident, accessible godhead? I'm in.

Howard the Duck:  Didn't work in the '80's.  I see no reason why he works now.

Deadpool:  If there is one character who defines all that is wrong with Marvel Comics it is this one.  Ever since they decided he would break the 4th wall and be a commentary on comic books, he became a never ending Jay Leno monologue: not quite actually funny, but funny enough to keep going long past the natural end of the gag.  Any attempt to actually develop the character is undermined by his self-awareness.  People will buy this for the same reason plenty of people watched Leno, but that doesn't mean either one are actually worth watching.

Squadron Supreme:  Has this long suffering team finally found a regular comic they can call home?  Maybe, if you like D-List Avengers who walk the line between super-hero and anti-hero.  In the past that has been hardly anyone...

The Mighty Thor:  I am so glad this isn't called "She-Thor" or something miserable.  Still, it's Thor, just the title passed to Jane Foster.  Probably worth a look in the post-Secret Wars era.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.  I can't wait to read a boring comic book based on a boring TV show.  Oh, wait.  Turns out I can.

The Vision:  I like the Vision more than I like the Scarlet Witch, but I haven't really followed the character in years. Is he still a kid?  I'll probably thumb through this and then make a call.

Uncanny Inhumans:  I like Charles Soule.  I'm bored of the Inhumans.  For my money Paul Jenkins had the first and last word on this group.  But I still like Charles Soule.

Contest of Champions:  If this is what it looks like, then the Maestro is going to pit Marvel characters against one another in gladiator style combat.  If that's what this is, and that's all there is to it, I'm in.

Captain Marvel:  Just not a character I have ever had much affinity for.  If she's your favorite, then I hope they do her justice.

All-New, All-Different Avengers:  Why is Miles Morales on this team of otherwise heavy hitters?  Because the Avengers cannot exist without a Spider-Man, dammit.  Spider-Man means sales.  Otherwise this is a strong team.  But Miles has school.

Doctor Strange:  If I had to pick a hyper-stylized artist to like, it would be Chris Bachalo.  I've liked his Doctor Strange in the past.  Let's hope the Sorcerer Supreme can make another go at a regular comic.

Totally Awesome Hulk:  I hear it's not Banner.  Speculation is that it's Amadeus Cho.  As long as we are done, done, done with all of the Red Hulks, Purple Hulks, Yellow She-Hulks, and so on, I'm willing to give the Hulk another look.  But you have to promise me we are done with all of that.

A-Force:  I'm kind of liking this during Secret Wars, so if I still like it when Secret Wars is over, I'll likely keep going.

Invincible Iron Man: We already have an Iron Man book in this announcement.  It stars Spider-Man.  This book is redundant at best.



So all in all I'm looking forward to about 4 of these books, Spider-Man, Contest of Champions, Angela, and Captain America.  There are a lot of iffy titles, and plenty of outright "no thank you" books out there.  It will be interesting to come back in a year and see what still stands.  My bet for first blood is Web Warriors.  That thing has Slingers written all over it.  If you haven't seen all of the covers and blurbs for all 45 announced titles, you can check them out at CBR here.

The Original All-New, All-Different...

This Week's Comics 5.20.15

Two years ago, I stopped buying comic books.  My son was just born, and time and money were in rapidly decreasing supply.  Likewise, the quality of the comics I was buying was also in decline.  So, in a move I couldn't have fathomed a decade prior, I quit buying new comics.  I started living on a steady diet of back issues and that is what lead to my current PURGE project. (see recent entries related to comics)
I kept my eye on the comics scene during my absence from partaking and honestly, I didn't get the impression I was missing much.  Then came Marvel's announcement of their upcoming (now current) Secret Wars event.  Secret Wars promised to fix everything that was wrong with the Marvel Universe and return the Marvel Empire to its previous glory.  Being a die-hard Marvel fan who quit in disgust, this naturally intrigued me, so I started following along by reading great comic book news sites like CBR. At the same time, the lovely wife was really getting into classic Disney Duck Comics, the collected works of Don Rosa and Carl Banks specifically (with big help from CBR Pipeline writer Augie De Blieck Jr.).  As luck would have it, Disney was about to launch new Donald Duck and Scrooge McDuck comics.  So I took this as a sign that the universe wanted me to take another look at my beloved hobby once again.

Long ago, I used to do a feature called the Comic of the Week, or something, that no one ever read. In that time honored tradition I am going to start sharing with you the comics that I am buying and let you know how my return to comic readership is going.  I'll likely not buy comics every week as I am only getting a very few, but whenever I pick some up, I'll share my insights with you.  Maybe this will help inform your own comics purchases, maybe not, but either way, my opinion will be out there, which is honestly where it needs to be.

So without further ado, here are the comics I bought this week and some thoughts to go along with them:

First up, is A-Force #1.  Marvel's Secret Wars all female Avengers team!  My fear is that this is a gimmick comic that will sell strong for four or five issues and then vanish, but based on the first issue it is worth at least a look.  I have no idea which universe these characters are pulled from, but it can't be the main Marvel U because there are all kinds of crazy things going on.  So if you aren't overly familiar with She-Hulk or Loki or Captain Marvel, that's ok.  You'll get all you need from the story itself.  The first issue is a better-than-average set-up issue that delivers a full story and does a better job of explaining Secret Wars than Secret Wars #1 or #2 did.  I'll get issue #2 and see where this one goes.




Spawn #252.  I was super excited when Paul Jenkins was named the writer taking over for McFarlene, but he's off to a bit of a slow start.  We are two issues in, and while I get the general gist of the plot, the finer points are being lost on me, mostly because I've been out of the Spawn universe for about 8 years and I'm not sure why he has Venom teeth or what his relationship with Malebolgia and the rest of the cast is.  I'm trying to stick with it because I believe in Jenkins' ability to tell awesome, character-driven stories, but this one needs a kick in the pants to get going.  I'm good for about two more issues if things don't pick up.





Finally, True Believers:  Age of Apocalypse #1.  Marvel is doing something really smart here for once.  The True Believers line is a series of one-shot issues that spotlight some of the biggest storylines in Marvel history.  For instance, this issue, Age of Apocalypse #1 is a reprint of X-men: Alpha #1 which launched the now legendary Age of Apocalypse story.  There won't be an issue #2, but there are smartly placed ads for the trade paperbacks that collect the whole story, so if you like what you see, you know where to go.  The best part:  these comics are just $1.  That's right, $1.  And what's more, there are NO ADS, except for the ones in the back for the trades.  It's a genius way to celebrate the rich history of the Marvel U, introduce new readers to classic stories, and get everyone geared up for Secret Wars.  It is no coincidence that each True Believer comic spotlights a Marvel Era that is represented in that story. Again, smart for once.  I have seen TB one-shots for things like the Infinity Gauntlet, Iron Man: Armor Wars and Ultimate Spider-man.  So I'll probably be picking up a few more of these.

Marvel Comics: House of M

As I am making my way through the letter "H" during my comics PURGE, I ran across the House of M limited series from 2005.  I remember being moderately satisfied with it at the time, but ultimately saw it as just another piece of the flawed attempt to resuscitate the floundering House of Ideas. However, upon my second read this weekend, a decade later, my eyes were opened to what is actually a rather good story with some really strong, character defining moments.  Let's take a look:


Just after the turn of the century, Brian Michael Bendis, for all intents and purposes, acquired complete control of the Marvel Universe with the goal of bringing it back from the brink of disaster.  Heroes Reborn/Return had flopped, Spider-Man Chapter One was yet another disaster in the life of that franchise, and the rest of the Marvel U was just all over the place.  Bendis swept into the Marvel offices like a less skeevy Rasputin with a grand plan to save the comics giant from becoming another DC.  His plan centered around completely destabilizing the status quo of most of the signature characters and then filling in the gaps with extremely solid characterization and a lot of "realistic" dialogue.  Whether he was successful or not is really a matter for debate and, at least for me, hinges upon how much you loved the Marvel Universe before about 1995, but either way, Bendis undeniably changed the way Marvel Comics were written, thought about, and executed.

It was also during this time that the "Marvel Way" became synonymous with "write for trade."  And for good reason.  Bendis is the king of the big picture.  His strength is in writing the long story.  His single issue work is extremely hit and miss, with a lot of misses, but when it comes to writing a 6 or 9 part story (or longer in the case of his absolutely riveting run on Daredevil), he is a master.  House of M demonstrates this better than any other series of his I've read thus far.

The story is a bridge between two of Bendis' main events.  The preceding event, Avengers Disassembled, was a huge story that rocked the world's greatest heroes to their core, Marvel-killed* a few major players, and led to the creation of a very different kind of Avengers team.  This event was caused by the Scarlet Witch losing control of her powers after going quite mad.  (*Marvel-killed, of course, means that the character "dies" with the full intention of bringing them back as soon as sales dwindle or fan reaction is negative enough).  House of M was the next step in the plan.  After determining that the Scarlet Witch was the cause of the crisis, all of the major players in the Marvel Universe came together to decide what to do with her.  This sets the stage for issue #1 of the House of M limited series.

The story is a little slow to start with the first four issues slowly establishing the world we are about to play in.  First we see the world in the aftermath of Avengers Disassembled and the major players deciding the fate of Wanda Maximoff.  Then, in a literal flash the world is remade into one where mutants reign supreme.  Magneto is the monarch of a world in which humans are the minority.  One of the interesting side effects is that all of the heroes involved in the Avengers Disassembled event have been given their most cherished desires.  All would be just fine, except that one very important character remembers things the way they were (and are supposed to be).  That character is Wolverine, whose greatest desire was to have complete memory of his past.  Unfortunately, that level of recall also allowed him to remember that things used to be different.  Armed with this knowledge, Logan realizes it is up to him to set things right.  Along the way he encounters another mutant, a new character named Layla Miller, who can awaken the same realization in other people.  Together, they set out to convert the other key players and find a way to reverse the effect of the House of M.

All in all a good premise and a pretty good superhero yarn.  And then we get to issue #5.  Issue #5 firmly plants this story into the Marvel Archive as one of the classics.  In this issue we get the full impact of the consequences of the House of M because it is here that Logan must show Peter Parker that his ideal life is a lie and must come to an end.  Peter does not take it well.  Nor should he.  In the House of Magnus world he has it all.  He's married to Gwen Stacy, Uncle Ben is alive and well, he has a child, and he is famous for being Spider-Man.  He has everything he could ever want and it is all as real as anything could be.  There's no "too good to be true" aspect to his life, it's just his ideal life realized.  So, of course, Logan has to come and literally destroy all of that by having Layla awaken the reality inside him.

Bendis shines in his depiction of Peter's suffering as a result of the loss.  His grief and rage are real and powerful.  From this point forward, the character of Spider-Man should really never be the same.  (sadly, that becomes all too true, but not in a good way)  As a reader and life-long fan of Spider-Man, I can honestly say Peter's turmoil hits home hard.  It is painful to see the character put through these paces and presented with such profound anguish.  But because Bendis is smart and a true character writer, it is also a very satisfying read.

The story goes on as planned with the heroes banding together to right the wrong that created the House of Magnus alternate universe.  I'll not spoil some of the better twists of the story here. Very entertaining and all in all a good superhero plot, but the real strength of the writing is the handling of the characters and their various reactions to learning the truth.  Peter's reaction is the one that really resonates with me, but there is a lot of great character work being done in this series.  When the awakened heroes all get together to plan their attack, Cyclops is laying out the battle plan explaining that there will be three strike teams.  Then Jessica Drew interrupts with the apt question as to whether or not reverting things is even the right thing to do, suggesting that maybe this was meant to happen and is the right thing to have happen.  The heroes all go down that theoretical path with her for about a page and then Cyclops basically says, "are we all done with that?  Good.  There will be three teams..."  It is an incredible moment for that character as well; perhaps one of my favorite Cyclops moments of all time.

There is also a nice moment with Spider-Man and Logan, shortly after Spidey learns the truth, where he emotionally crosses a moral barrier he once held sacred.  I'll let the comic speak for itself here:

If you are a classic Spider-Man fan of any measure, that is a huge moment.  Bendis makes it very easy to get caught up in the moment with Peter.

And then of course, there is the iconic moment at the end of the series where the Scarlet Witch strikes again with her incredible power, this time in reverse, wiping out all mutants except for a tiny handful. This sets the stage for the next big Marvel event.  The Bendis era at Marvel was defined by yearly, mythos-shattering events that constantly rewrote the Marvel status quo.  The only real downfall in the House of M is the lack of a truly satisfying ending. The end of this series is really just a prologue to the next big event as the Marvel Universe deals with the sudden near-extinction of the mutant population and it feels like the story is more of a transition than a fully told tale.  If this story was allowed to have a more complete end, it would easily stand up next to classics like Days of Future Past or the Dark Phoenix Saga, but since the end feels more like a prologue, the denouement of the main plot is a little hollow.

But if you want a good look at how to tell character driven stories in a microcosm, you really cannot do much better than House of M issues #5-8.  Bendis gives a clinic in how to take established characters and put them through their paces.  I am extremely, pleasantly surprised to rediscover this series after nearly dismissing it a decade ago.  There is some tremendous work here if you are a fan of classic Marvel.

Marvel Movie Project #1: X-Men: First Class

X-Men: First Class. The movie that topped the list forever. As a matter of fact, this movie ranked #1 over all until I conceded it to #2 in order to settle another ranking argument--it was my bargaining chip. And because this movie and the other #1 ranker are so close, I was ok with the concession. The difference is by a hair. Seriously. Luckily, we decided at the last minute to make it a tie, so really, what WAS #2, is now sharing its crown in the 1st Place Spot. Where I wanted it to be.



Obviously I think pretty highly of this movie. I saw it 2-3 times in the theater. It was a blockbuster summer for Marvel Movies, with Thor and Captain America rounding things out, but this film was a bit under the radar. I wasn't even really aware it was coming out until right before it did; I knew virtually nothing about it. It made me a bit nervous.

Why nervous? Well, there was a little movie called X-Men Origins: Wolverine. And as we wrote, it was awful. But it turns out, that's not even the movie that I wound up thinking about while writing this review. No, like my obsession with The Incredible Hulk vs. Iron Man, X-Men: First Class goes head-to-head with summer-release-mate Captain America.

You've got two similar concepts--super hero origin stories set in a period backdrop of political conflict (Cuban missile crisis for X-Men: First Class/World War II for Captain America). One executes a flawlessly believable and meticulously detailed early 1960s world stage; the other executes a hokey, half-assed, inattentive quasi-WW2 era backdrop. One is a smooth spy thriller involving a mutant strike team, one is a sloppy summer action movie that fails on most levels.

Since I saw X-Men: First Class before seeing Captain America... you can figure it out. Hell, I saw Super 8 before seeing Captain America, and I think it managed to nail "period piece" more adroitly.

This movie isn't without its faults. It has them. I would have liked a little less convenience surrounding Beast's transformation/romance with Mystique. But it wasn't jarring, and it wasn't a crucial plot point or anything. It moved the plot along, sure, but you could have just as easily conveyed the story without it.

The star of the show is the relationship between Magneto and Professor X. Or, as they are called in this film, Erik and Charles. What's nice here is they let this pivotal relationship be troubled but enduring. By the end, when their philosophies have diverged permanently, you can still see that between the two of them exists some understanding and compassion. There are shades of this in the other X-Men films, but it has been best illustrated here.

I thoroughly enjoy Kevin Bacon's unexpected performance as Sebastian Shaw. He rather steals the show, in fact. I like him as a conniving, behind-the-scenes player orchestrating world politics, rather than resorting to overt terrorism (Liberty Island in X-Men, for example.) It results in a slower-burning, larger-scale conflict interwoven somewhat smartly into existing history, in a way that doesn't piss me off. Sure, it's incredibly unlikely, and I know better, but this is also a world with mutants in it, it closely involves "top secret" style dealings, and they don't do anything remarkably stupid while they are monkeying with history. Scenes are tense and not "oh, how coincidental!" at all.

I enjoy the multilingual nature of the film. It globe-trots with the ease and experience of a Connery Bond film. Michael Fassbender is quickly earning a top slot on my "Celebrity Crushes" list. Not because he's pretty (have you even seen the list?) but because he seems so authentic. Anyone who can charm me as an android, Carl Jung and Magneto deserves special note. The quietly skillful nature of this film is most evident as Fassbender glides between German, French, Spanish, and English as he tracks Shaw across hemispheres. We are also treated to Russian for good measure. I prefer subtitles--unless a film is intended for an English-speaking audience and the vast majority of dialogue would be delivered in another language (for example, The Hunt for Red October). 

Now, if you read my Captain America evisceration, you'll know that design aesthetic is one of my top pet peeves. Nothing tanks a period piece like bad sets, costumes and anachronistic concepts. Luckily, First Class doesn't seem to fall for those traps. I think that's especially clear when we see Cerebro for the first time.

Why does this stand out? After being treated to this gem, it makes all the anachronistic computer displays and TV monitors of Captain America about as welcome as Saruman in Rivendell during the events of The Hobbit.

Cerebro looks like a computer of the early sixties. As a matter of fact, it looks enough like what it's supposed to look like I didn't feel the need to pick it apart. It may not be totally Kosher, but I'm willing to let that slide a little, seeing as how it was invented by a wunderkind with complete access to the resources of the CIA. It's not a modern device with a 60s skin attached. Did I mention that, like with the TV issue on Captain America, I also have fondness for vintage computers?


I appreciate that this film side-steps the urge to call attention to its period trimmings. Since I've already brought it up, Super 8 had a real groaner in it, where we're supposed to look at the WACKY NEW WALKMAN ALL THE KIDS HAVE! IMAGINE HOW BAD IT WOULD BE IF ALL THE KIDS HAD PORTABLE MUSIC!

X-Men: First Class manages to not do this. Look, the early sixties are often a bit overlooked, because the late 60s/early 70s are really, really overpoweringly gaudy and garish. The early 1960s blends the class and civility of 50s design with the beginnings of sleek super mod, and the results are things like Shaw's submarine/yacht, the Hellfire Club, and really swank barware. It's done here just right, in little touches like wallpaper or lamps, or clothing.


Through and through, though, this is truly a wonderful story of team building and friendship. It's exciting, it doesn't need to make you crazy, and it features some nice cameos that almost tie it to the other X-men films...but it easily stands alone. Its faults only run as far as "was that little subplot necessary?" but nothing in the film is so distracting or meaningless that it ruins it. I think this is a tight, sophisticated reinterpretation that is a welcome change of pace from a super-hero slugfest--something not even the previous X-men installments were able to avoid.


I really feel that, of all the wonderful films on our list, this one tops it out. It has the fewest problems and the best attention to detail. It even manages to be smart at the same time, even at the end. Sure, it's an unbelievable story, but 'tis a tale of mutants, after all.

Best part of the film. Hands down!

Marvel Movie Project #5: X2: X-Men United

And here we are in the Top 5!  And kicking it off with what was the greatest team movie for a very long time!  When X-men came out it was a vanguard.  It broke new ground and made all of the mistakes one might make when blazing a new trail.  X2 was the follow-up that smoothed all of those wrinkles.  In the vein of Empire Strikes Back, X2 captures the essence of great characters in a way the introductory tail cannot.  It puts those great characters through their paces and explores their motivations and desires with a level of depth and care you can only achieve with characters that are already established. And the best part of it all (for nerds), is that this film manages to do that by successfully drawing from powerful source material in the comic books.

One of the best things you can do in storytelling is make the villain of the piece so compelling that you can almost see their side of the story and you find yourself not entirely against them.  X2 nails this.  Mutants as a whole are up against a communal threat in William Stryker, a human who seeks to use his mutant son (no moral ambiguity there) to wipe out all mutants.  The abduction of Charles Xavier to this end forces an extremely uneasy alliance between Magneto and his rag-tag bad of evil mutants and the X-men.  The two divergent teams must work together to free Xavier and stop Stryker's plan.  This leads to many opportunities for tension between Magneto and the X-men and forces you to consider that Magneto is more than just a bad guy who tried to basically do the reverse of Stryker last movie.  The depth and complexity of the character gets careful attention as you realize he is more about protecting his people from those who hate and fear them, than he is about just being evil.  And the best part is that X2 allows this to happen organically and not shove it down your throat.  Smartly done.  Magneto led the X-men in the comics for a time as well (probably several times given Marvel's inability to write fresh stories in the past 20 years...), and it was a powerful story to read.  It is always nice to see that kind of crafty storytelling translated to the 2 hour format.

He said he could help you! Let him! Damn it! It would be so badass!

Because the people behind X2 learned from the first film, there is also a healthy Wolverine sub-plot that pits him against the man who made him (Stryker) and his newest, deadliest toy, Lady Deathstrike.  Thus, we gets lots more Wolverine action and as you all know, I could watch Hugh Jackman be a badass all day.  But the Logan subplot is smart too, and it doesn't try to steal the show, it just hums along adding meat to an already delicious story.   The showdown between Logan and Deathstrike is as epic as anything in the comics.

And I haven't even mentioned Nightcrawler yet!  Kurt Wagner is as rich and complex a character as you might want.  To be able to introduce him and use him as an obvious plot device, and still make him a funny and sympathetic character proves that X2 is one of the most carefully written movies on our list.  And creepiest, watch closely during the part where they go to rescue the children, Nightcrawler is actually in the room BEFORE he teleports in.  Look in the shadows behind the children just before he teleports in, he's already THERE!  CREEPY!

The only weak part of this movie for me was Stryker.  He was compelling as the mastermind of the plan, but he was kind of flat as the main enemy.  His son is a wheelchair bound headcase, so there's not much threat there either.  But if it means a smart story rife with moral ambiguity and deep characters, I'll take a meek bad guy.  To be honest, The Incredible Hulk would have been #1 on this list (maybe) if it had taken the meeker villain approach.  X2 features the kind of story that doesn't want a big Hollywood beat 'em up ending.  We don't need a literal monster to fight here, because Stryker, his hate and his plan are evil enough. I just wish Stryker himself were a bit more interesting.

All in all mild critique for what is otherwise a smart, action-packed sequel that learns all of the lessons from its ground-breaking predecessor. X2 is definitely top 5 material.

Aimee's Take:

First, allow me to apologize for the tardiness of this article--Stan and I welcomed baby boy into the Frankfurter family at the end of September, and it's been quite a little while since I had a few minutes to string together somewhat coherent thoughts while at a keyboard. As you can see, based upon the previous sentence, I'm not quite back into the swing of things yet. 

X2. Whew, ok, let me start by saying this is probably in my personal top 5 for sure. It's certainly my favorite of the first series X-Men movies (eat that Wolverine). 

What can I say? I love pretty much everything about it. I love the cooperative aspect between the X-Men and the Brotherhood; I love Magneto's escape from the plastic prison; I love the Weapon X sequence... but most of all I love how it's a relatively small story that has large implications. What they're working to stop is the annihilation of all mutants/then humans, but it's not a doomsday device--it's the mind and Cerebro with which we play. In other words, the antagonists exploit Professor X's own equipment. Very refreshing. 

I don't mind Stryker as much as my loving husband. I think he seems like the right kind of bloated old asshole who has allowed prejudice and personal tragedy to fester. I can easily see why he has spent years grinding an ax. I think he's pretty much the perfect threat.

But who are we kidding? The best part of the movie is the opening Nightcrawler sequence. Actually, I think Nightcrawler is the best thing about this movie (and considering it's mostly about Wolverine, that's saying something.)

And, the second best part of this movie is the sequence where the mansion is evacuated and Wolverine is a freakin' badass.

You tell me this doesn't belong in the top 5. Seriously. Yeah, I know, I know, Captain America, blah blah blah. It sucked, get over it. Maybe Winter Soldier will be better.

Marvel Movie Project #7: X-men: Last Stand

Everyone hates this movie except me and I have only found out about this recently.  I don't get it.  X-men 3 isn't The Avengers, but it also isn't Fantastic Four and while I realize there is a sea of difference between the two, I struggle to find what's not to like here. (Aimee will help us out there)  I mean, this movie pretty much has it all:  more fun with characters I like, the balls to kill off three very prominent characters, new/interesting villains, old/interesting villains, a fairly straightforward plot, the Beast says "oh my stars and garters" and it works!, and big climactic final battle that rivals some of the great X-men showdowns in the comics!

X-men 3 is a logical and necessary conclusion to X-2, so it is never going to stand on its own as a great film, but as team movies go I think it is pretty strong.  Sure, the Angel storyline is almost completely superfluous, but it is also very forgettable.  I think the balance is better here than it was in X-men, which, while being a decent ensemble piece, felt like Wolverine's debutant ball.  By the time we get to X-men 3, the characters are all fully developed and we are allowed to enjoy them being put to the test.  Storm in particular shines in this film where before Halle Berry seemed more content to play Catwoman.  Kelsey Grammar is an unexpectedly compelling Beast, and Rebecca Romijn gets a surprising twist in Mystique story arc.  And, of course, Ellen Page captures Kitty Pryde dead-on.

There is a lot to like in X-men 3 and a lot of lessons have been learned.  Gone are the days of the World Peace Festivals and Doomsday machines.  Instead we get a plot that, while condensed, is straight from the pages of the comic books.  We get internal strife within the X-men as characters follow their natural story arcs and disagree on what is best for the future of the team.  We get plenty of hard-hitting action without having to concoct a lot of goofy reasons for it.  Comic book nerds also get lots of nuggets to feast upon with cameos by Jamie Madrox the Multiple Man and Psylocke and much needed screen time for the under-used Colossus.  Not to mention the awesome "Days of Future Past" Danger Room sequence.

With all of these great things going on, I find it hard to find major fault anywhere in this film.  For me it is just a fun action-romp with great X-men characters in a world that has been firmly established.  Does it have problems?  Sure.  But they are not big enough for me to get in a snit over and they certainly do not diminish my enjoyment of this film.  There are two (three if you count The Avengers) other team films ahead of this one on the list, but X-men 3 earns its #7 spot by learning from the mistakes of other team films, particularly X-men, and succeeding in delivering a blockbuster-type experience.

Aimee's Take:

I really don't like Angel, I think he's stupid. 

I really don't care for the "mutant cure" premise.

I think there are altogether too many premises in this movie.

But, here's the good news. It's mostly ok. The film manages to execute a lot of interesting things and represent characters, in general, much better than the first installment. It's a good movie. It has a lot going on, though--so you have to pay attention.

I'm biased. I saw this movie and did not like it at all in the theater. I had no idea where it was building and no patience for any pay off. I was pissed that it took a long time to get there, too.

Here's the thing, though, the second viewing changed things for me. Once the burden of navigating the plot was off my shoulders, it became much easier to sit back and enjoy the movie. Do I think it's the best out there? No. Is it better than much of the stuff that exists lower on the list? Yes. Is it better than, for example Spider-Man? I'm not as sure. I think it's better than the first X-Men.

I think this makes everything ok.

I lobbied pretty hard for this movie to be lower on the list. Stan wanted it higher. In order to keep X3 sufficiently low, I had to relinquish my stranglehold on the #1 spot. I think it was ultimately worth it; this movie is good but not great and should take a lower spot compared to what comes later on this list. And the #1 spot was almost a coinflip anyway...

 

Marvel Movie Project #9: X-men

That's right, another one from the early days that still manages to hold up, even in the face of far superior super-hero team movies like The Avengers.  X-men has obvious signs of being an early super-hero movie: there is the improbably world peace summit or whatever, there is the giant doomsday device that makes mutants via a whirling gyroscope, and there is inevitable battle atop a national landmark.  All entirely unnecessary, but not unexpected in a film that breaks ground the way X-men does.

If you overlook the goofy "Hollywood" crap, what you find underneath is a movie with a lot of heart that gets its base characters pretty much exactly right, and tells an adventure story that is fun to watch.  With a simple adventure story, there is plenty of time to focus on getting those characters right and satisfying the nerd contingent while also keeping things light enough for those who actually get out and date.

Speaking of getting characters right, Hugh Jackman.  Much like Snipes and Blade, I will accept NO ONE ELSE in the role of Wolverine.  Jackman nails the character right out of the gate and once he is introduced to the story, he is the reason we watch.  Look, Patrick Stewart is incredible as Professor X and Gandalf is compelling as Magneto (more so in the second film).  Cyclops, Jean, Rogue and Iceman are all great, but Jackman is so likeable as Logan that what is intended to be a team film borders on being a Wolverine film (and better one than the actual Wolverine film...)  Rebecca Romijn is also a breakout in this film, laying some nice groundwork for her future roles in the next two X-films.

Despite having a fairly standard plot, the storytelling is also smartly done here.  The story starts following Rogue, transitions to Logan and then opens up once we get to the school.  We are given two characters to relate to and to introduce us to the bigger world that the story takes place in.  It is also nice that the film has a sense of humor about itself that is allowed to manifest naturally through Logan's character ("what do they call you? Wheels?").  This keeps the gloomy plot from getting bogged down in itself and running us all into the river.

Like Blade, X-men is a product of the dawning of a new era in comic book movies.  It has its stumbling points, but it also has its successes and those successes greatly outweigh the "blockbuster syndrome" that plagues so many films of this genre.  It features enough geek moments for us comic book fans, but does not do so to the exclusion of a general audience.

Aimee's Take:

I'm not as taken with this film through the lens of time, but it's still a very serviceable X-Men vehicle. It suffers from all the problems of a major "introductory" film (i.e. "Hey, look at all these characters! This is what they do!") and suffers from some odd choices on the part of the direction/acting (Storm's inconsistent accent comes to mind.)

Still, it manages to capture the essential flavors of all the characters presented. Stan is quite correct; Hugh Jackman kills it as Wolverine and I'll accept no substitutes. It's not his fault that the stand-alone movie sucked. I think Cyclops is a douche here, but he is in the comics so no harm done. Magneto is compellingly cardboard here, doing typical super villain type stuff, but failing to delve much deeper. It's ok, though, there are more movies to go into with these characters and they improve. Oh, do they improve.

I think the ridiculous "world peace togetherness" bullshit is what kills the overall greatness of the film. A number of earlier comic book efforts are guilty of this, and I continue to hate seeing it. The over-the-top Hollywood ending is a miserable thing to saddle a movie with, and sadly, this isn't the last we see of it. Not by a long shot.

While not, to me, as satisfying as our last entry, Punisher: War Zone, this movie packs an overall higher quality of storytelling, depth of character and production value. When you add in a little top-notch casting and characterization, X-Men manages to present a solid, fun ride that is ultimately quite worthy of the Top Ten.

A Closer Look at Uncanny X-men for the NES

A Closer Look at Uncanny X-men for the NES

Yes, so here we are again, in a place I never expected to be, much less twice.  Coming to the defense of an LJN game isn’t easy, but once again my eyes have been opened to a game that at first blush appears to be a steaming pile, but upon closer inspection turns out not to suck as much as I thought.  Heck, with the game in question, I’d even be so bold as to now admit that I like the game a lot.  The previous sentences are ones I would have never expected to write about X-men for the NES, but here we are.It all started over on NintendoAge, a fellow website devoted to all things Nintendo, where we are discussing “impossible” to beat NES games and I threw out X-men as a candidate. My previous experience with the game indicated that it was pretty much unplayable. Another poster replied that not only was X-men beatable, but there were people out there who could do it in short order and that once you learned the intricacies of the game, it was actually quite playable.  Certain that I had missed something, and being a big Marvel Comics fan who was sorely disappointed by this title back in the 80’s, I set out to find if this poster was indeed correct.

Step One:  Read the freaking Instruction Manual.  This should be a disclaimer for all video games made before the PSX.  It should be second nature to old schoolers like me, but I’ve been spoiled by the in-game tutorial that is a staple of modern games.  That doesn’t dismiss the fact that I obviously played this as a kid without reading the manual, but it was probably a rental and those never had a manuals, so leave me alone!  Anyway, read the damn manual if you want a shot at playing this game and understanding what is going on.

Step Two:  Play cautiously, learn the game.  The biggest mistake I made was thinking that this game was a standard dungeon crawler like Gauntlet and ran in guns a-blazing.  That will not work with X-men.  You have to play carefully, at least until you are familiar with the game play and level design.  Take your time.
If you follow those two steps you just might be able to salvage your opinion of this game.  And if you are really crazy, like me, you just might find you actually like it, a lot.  What the hell.

So how do you go from completely dismissing a game to playing it for hours on end?  Sheer will power.  If someone else had possessed the wherewithal to actually beat this game, then there must be something to it.  I’ve never let a game best me and I wasn’t about to let X-men be the first! So I started playing and kept playing and playing.  Here is what I discovered.  In all honesty, X-men feels like a sloppily made dungeon crawler that was pretty much already programmed when someone from LJN got a hold of the X-men license and started shopping around what they could do for an X-men themed game.  Somebody pulled out this program and said they could change the sprites to look like the heroes from the comic and minutes later this game appeared on toy store shelves across America.  I kid you not.  The game is only loosely based on the comic books, despite the aforementioned, very well themed Instruction Manual.

The Unstoppable Shooting Juggernaut!

Take the bosses for example: Sabretooth, White Queen, Juggernaut and Boomerang.  Boomerang?  Since when is he an X-men villain?  Dude fights the Hulk and Spider-man and maybe like Daredevil.  He has no beef with mutants that I am aware of.  Why is he in here instead of Blob or Pyro?  Also, Juggernaut, the character known for being “unstoppable” has decided to forgo his usual MO of ramming people into pulp in favor of shooting some kind of electric beams at you.  And while we’re at it, the White Queen acts more like Mystique since she takes your form and attacks you as you.  Heck the sprite even looks like Mystique!  Oh and Sabretooth jumps a lot.  Now you tell me this game was designed with a working knowledge of the X-men and their rogues’ gallery…

Anyway, if we look past the half-heartedly applied theming, what we are left with is an average or below average dungeon crawler that is tricky to learn, but once it has been learned, it proves to be simple and even fun.   For an added kick, once you learn the game, you can reapply the theming and ignore some obvious mistakes and enjoy the game at its fullest.  By no means am I suggesting that X-men is a classic, but it may not suck as much as you or I originally thought.  The key is to be patient and learn its ins and outs.  The remainder of this article is designed as a guide to getting some enjoyment out of this game and to redeem what is otherwise a dismal, comic-based video game.  Having finally beaten X-men, I can say with some authority that X-men for the NES isn’t as bad as its reputation, but isn’t as good as it should have been.

But enough defending LJN games, next month I’ll take a Closer Look at something that we have unknowingly allowed to happen over the past 30 years, and we are worse for it…


TIPS AND TRICKS

Ranged vs. Melee Heroes.  Your team is split into two types of characters: ranged and melee.  My first instinct was that ranged was the way to go, but I soon discovered the advantage of the melee type.  Ranged characters are great because they can attack from a distance and hit multiple enemies at once.  Where they come up short is defense.  A few good hits means curtains for them and if an enemy spawns under them, it’s goodnight Gracie (George Burns, look it up).  Melee characters have to get up close and personal to take down bad guys, but they have more HP and defense to make up for this fact.  I prefer the melee guys for this very reason.  If you are going to use ranged heroes, pick up every, and I mean every, Energy and Invincibility power-up you see.  This is a good strategy in general (see below), but for ranged characters this is not optional.  Iceman can have full health one minute and be seconds from death the next.  Do not risk it.

Colossus is the best character in the game.  Why?  Durability.  He has the most HP and he packs the biggest punch.  I believe you can beat the game with him alone if you have to.  Sure he’s slow, but so what?  That really only comes into play in the Robot Factory and even then you can work around his speed.
Storm and Nightcrawler are useless.  Useless.  Both have the resilience of a paper hat in the rain.  They will die instantly upon contact with an enemy and their attack power is not sufficient to make up for their lack of fortitude.  These two are expendable.  Do not use either as your main character unless you just really want a challenge.
Wolverine, Cyclops and Iceman are all good middle of the road characters.  Wolverine is a lot like Colossus, but with a little less durability.  He can go a long way, but sometimes needs some help.  Cyclops and Iceman are the best ranged attackers, but they can’t take too many hits, so use carefully.  Other than the fact that Iceman can fly (?) they are virtually identical.

MINI-WALKTHROUGH

My strategy is to start with Colossus and Storm in the Underground Sewers level.  Storm will fold like a chair at the civic center pretty much as soon as the level starts, so get that out of the way.  Colossus is best to fight Sabretooth since Toothy tends to jump a lot and Colossus can just stand there and wail on him.  Plus Sabretooth tends to work in an “L” shaped pattern so he will just keep running into Colossus’ fists.  Next I take Cyclops and Nightcrawler to the Future City Street Fight.  Once again, Nightcrawler lasts about as long as a bag of cookies at my overweight aunt’s house, so he’ll be out quick.  Cyclops is pretty fast and has powerful optic blasts so he can mow through bad guys pretty easily.  Iceman is equally reliable, and if Cyclops goes down, Bobby is my back-up.  Next I take Cyclops (or Iceman) to the Robot Factory along with Wolverine; sorry Logan you’re not going to make it.  Again, Cyclops is great against Juggernaut because he can wail on him from a distance (see below about Bosses that Shoot).  Finally, I take Cyclops and Iceman, one of them must die sadly, to the Living Alien Ship and run amok in there.  The White Queen is an easy kill.  Then I load everybody back up into the station wagon and head for Magneto’s house, where we all get soundly trounced and I get to try it all over again… (see below about Getting to Magneto)  You may find it strange that despite my previous adoration for Colossus, I only used him once in this mini-walkthrough.  That is because he is my go-to.  If everyone else gets slaughtered in a mission for some reason, I know with reasonable certainty that I can put Colossus in there and get us through the mission.  Thus, I never put him on the front line unless I have to (like in the Sewers).

Laser gates are instant death.  I don’t care if Colossus has full health; he cannot make it through a laser gate without dying should the gate close on him.  Oh sure, you might make it once, but I promise you the odds are against you.  What’s worse, there is no real rhyme or reason to when they open or close.  It appears to be totally at random.  The only way I have found to get through these gates is to kill baddies until one drops an invincibility power-up.  Grab the power-up and run like hell through the gate.  It may take a minute for one to drop, but I promise the alternative is 99% certain death.


Power-ups:  There are two power-ups you should ALWAYS pick up: Invincibility and Energy.  Dying in this game is easy, very easy.  Stupid very easy.  To stave off the grave, pick up these two power-ups every, and I mean every, time they appear.  The Invincibility is great for obvious reasons and the Energy will refill your entire HP every time.  Picking these up every time is a no-brainer. Avoid the Magnet Mines like they were the plague.  If you are playing with a weaker character, these are instant death anyway, and they can be just as fatal for good characters.  The Time Stop and All Kill are good, but I wouldn’t risk anything going for them.  Use as you see fit.

Defeating Bosses that Shoot:  For some reason Boomerang is a boss in this game and he throws boomerangs at you (shoots).  Also the Juggernaut shoots at you, despite that being contrary to his very nature.  When dealing with bosses that shoot, for any reason, your best bet is to avoid being on the same level (line) as they are.  When you share a level (line) with them, their shots can hit you, otherwise they cannot.  Position yourself just below their level or just to the side if working vertically, and then wail on them with melee attacks or blast them with range attacks.  If they move to your level, adjust and repeat.  They will continuously try to walk to your level so if you are careful and time it right, you can often bounce them back and forth into your attack until they are vanquished.

Look before you leap.  Until you know the levels inside and out, walk carefully.  The levels are littered with poisonous floors, traps, spike pits and other pitfalls that look nothing like those kinds of things.  If you are walking and you hear the noise that indicates you are taking damage, check where you are, chances are good you are standing on a trap or other floor hazard.  Get off of there quick.  Weaker characters will be pretty much instantly killed by these, so mark them well and avoid.

Violence is NOT the answer.  Most of the time, the bad guys in this game are not really out to get you as much as they are just meandering about.  Thus, for several of the levels, you can clear entire areas with little to no violence at all.  Just run past everything.  Why is this a good idea?  Killing an enemy causes it to respawn and sometimes that happens right under where you are standing resulting in a quick death if you are not careful.  If killing them causes this, why do it?  Plus if you don’t stop to kill everything that shows up, you cannot get surrounded and blitzed from all sides. Play around and see which levels/areas you can clear with a minimum of conflict.  It may save you in the long run!

A note about escaping the Robot Factory.  On your way out of the boss room, you are going to pass through an area where the walls close off part of the room.  RUN.  Fast.  If you get stuck between these walls all you can do is sit and wait for the bomb to go off and kill you.  It is in your best interest to learn this room and its three closing walls well.  At the start, grab an Invincibility power-up if you can and then make a run for it.  If you get closed off before passing the first wall, you can always go back out the teleporter pad and come back in and the wall will be open again.  I have actually gotten stuck in the wall before as it closed on me, however I was able to wiggle free by repeatedly pressing the A and B button and pausing and unpausing the game.  Not sure if this will work every time, but it got me out once.  Also, occasionally picking up the Time Stop power-up will give you a speed boost, not sure what governs when and if this happens.  You can also use this to increase your speed and escape the closing walls. If you are playing as Colossus, this strategy is a must.
 
FINDING MAGNETO
Ok are you sitting down?  Are you ready for this?  There is absolutely nothing in the game that tells you how to access the final level against Magneto.  There is nothing in the instruction manual that tells you how to access the final level against Magneto.  The only thing that even hints at how to do this is printed in extremely small print at toward the bottom of the label on the game cartridge itself.  Not only that, but the hint that they give you on that label is WRONG.  You heard me.  If you beat all four regular levels, the game appears to be over, as you can only access the PRACTICE level.  However, once you have completed the four main levels, on the stage select screen, you press UP + B+ SELECT + START and it will take you to the character select screen where you pick the two heroes you want to take on Magneto and then it will whisk you off to the final level.  How totally messed up is that crap?

Now, before you race off to fight the bastard, spend at least one round in the PRACTICE level.  Why?  Doing so grants you access to all of your heroes again, even the dead ones – creepy, huh?– for use in the final level.  So killing off Iceman on the last level isn’t so bad after all.  And trust me, you are going to need them, Magneto’s lair is way tougher than the previous four levels!  Actually, you can do this after successful completion of any level, and that might be good for you as you practice, but don’t rely on it as a crutch, play the game!
Be careful!  Magneto’s lair is bigger than any of the previous levels and is a perilous maze.  Many of the passages lead to dead ends and the floors are riddled with traps.  The enemies move faster, spawn quicker and hit for more damage.  Once you get to Magento, he’ll act a lot like a Boss that Can Shoot, so use those strategies.  The only real difference is that the battle area is smaller, so watch your step.  Also, if he hits you with his magnetic beam, your controls will be temporarily reversed.  That is not good.  Your best bet is to try and trap him in the upper right corner of the screen and give him what for!

Hopefully, the above tips and strategies will help you get more out of this game than you did the first time you made a go at playing it.  Heck, if you are stupid like me, you might even like the game, but I’m not making any promises!